Monday, June 22, 2015

Scared at 39.

I am 39 years old and scared out of my pants about going to work in the fall. I know I can do it, just like I knew I could get my Bachelor's Degree. But this is so surreal, a job, me, a boss, 22 small little humans depending on me. It's all so crazy...stay tuned. 

Monday, July 21, 2014

Marriage...It's Not a Given.

I have not blogged in FOREVER and frankly I have a lot to say. So here we go. Let's start with marriage. I don't know why I chose that topic, but my hubby is on my mind this morning and we are just gonna talk about him. Shhh...Don't tell him!

I am 38 years old and have been with my husband since I was 18 years old, he was 19, and we have been married for 17 years this past Spring.  I can happily say we have NEVER broken up and I can also happily say this is the HARDEST thing ever! Spending your life with one person and their quirks is tough. For example, he can sleep till noon, I can't sleep past 7 most times. He can watch ESPN ALL DAY while in and out of napping, I want to watch House Hunters all day and see if they chose the house I would have chose.  He can stand outside in this Texas heat, for hours, cooking and watching football or listening to old country so loud that I can hear it in the house, while I want to stay inside listening to Justin Timberlake and redecorating something else for the millionth time. He can pop open a beer, or two, or three after mowing the lawn and say "it tastes like ice cream" and I want to drink a Starbucks refresher after HARD LABOR (Yes, I think mowing sucks). He sleeps in his socks, and that's just weird. He laughs at funny movies so loudly and turns blood red and I just want to die from embarrassment. His version of cooking family dinners, though always delicious, will consist of meat with no sides. I like to eat by 6 and he likes to eat whenever. His Saturday mornings (when I make him get up)  consist of going out in our shop and building something all day long while I want to hit Houston and shop and eat at some quaint little diner I found on the internet. He can rent a movie anytime that involves shooting something or blowing it up, while I want to go see an independent film that just came out at the theater about some long lost love. He can wear jeans, work boots (he's not a shit kicker, so remember these are work boots) and a tshirt on the daily while I want to dress up and GO! The list can go on and on. He is the complete opposite of me in most cases.

But, and yes I began this sentence with but, I have always treated our marriage like what it is, a contract. We really did sign paperwork and took an oath before God, our family, and friends.  You don't do that with parenting or anything else, you do it with marriage.  See I HATE HATE HATE when women, or men, but I really hear women say, "My husband has to love me and the kids forever", or "Can you believe he cheated on me? Our family?" or "My husband and I are best friends. We will be together forever". I call BS! If your husband is your best friend you need to get out more. I used to be one of those women. I even blogged a few years ago that Lance is my best friend.  Women NEED other women to talk to and to talk about men! You can't load your husband down with all our women stuff. They don't want to hear it all.  Of course I tell my husband things, and we are very close to one another. I ADORE the man but he doesn't give a crap about the latest town gossip, the new curtains I want or how to move our family to all organic food.  Let your man be a man, not a girlfriend!

I will leave you with this.  My husband and I made some major changes the last few years and really the last 6 months. We started treating each other like we were dating again. Treating each other with kindness, love, respect, and excitement at all times, not just some times! It is flipping working! We are acting like two teens these days and treating marriage like what it is, a constant battle for love.  Ladies remember, those kids are going to leave you one day and that man you are bitching about is going to be all you've got day in and day out! If he's not the one worth fighting for then....well, that's a whole other story.

I LOVE my man and he deserves my respect and attention, even if he wears socks to bed!

This is Me, Then.


Sunday, February 24, 2013

Wow, It's Been Awhile!

Wow, I Can't Believe I Haven't Blogged Since Last May!  YIKES!

I have so much to say, and so much to tell the world and I want to blog again.  I have so many little projects going on and so many things to be thankful for.  Going to clean up my blog pics and postings and hopefully get back blogging meals, projects and more. 

Remember, This is Me, Then.
I Change Every Minute!

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Slow and Steady Wins the Race

Well, I think about blogging all the time. Like when I drive on to the University of Houston Clear Lake campus and see a dozen deer literally staring at my car and eating grass and not fazed at all. Like when I drive into my drive way and see my daughter waiting for my son to get off the bus because she acts as mother hen for me when I have a late class or meeting.  Like when I get a shot at the diet doctor (yes I am seeing a doctor now to properly get this weight off and I have lost 12 lbs in a month, woohoo. Slow and steady wins the race) and the shot hurts and I want to blog about why did I let myself get this far. Like when I am kneeling at the altar every Sunday praying nothing but good to happen to certain people that have hurt me so badly this past year and continually do. Like when the letter came in the mail asking my daughter to be honored for her high scores on the ACT!  Like the moment my daughter was asked to attend a Duke University 3 week summer camp and the moment we figured out how much it cost! OUCH! Like when I am exhausted after subbing or after the part time job I took administering the STAAR test and I finally sit down at 10:00 at night and realize I have homework due by midnight. Like the moment I decided to take a May Mini (I am second guessing myself now). Like the moment I joined a book club and our first book was 50 Shades of Grey (We can talk about that another time). Like the moments when people don't show up, you can't fix those moments you missed. Like the moment I decided to be inducted not only into The National Society of Leadership and Success this semester but to also earn The Excellence Award. (NUTS NUTS NUTS, but I can explain later).  The moment I decided to take 12 hours this semester and my husband and best friend told me NO NO NO. (Guess what? I did it!)

So many other crazy wonderful sad and happy things have happened this past Spring and I am so blessed and fortunate to not only be alive, but also I am still painting the world Black and White one Pottery Barn catalog at a time!

(above is my greatest accomplishment thus far)

Oh, I did buy a piece of turquoise jewelry the other day!
Baby Steps Baby Steps!

Coming up next! I graduate this coming weekend with my
 Associates Degree!

This is Me, Then.

Thursday, March 1, 2012

Luncheon, well of course!

I was having lunch with a dear friend yesterday and I told her I was going to a luncheon today and she replied, "You are going to drive all the way over there for lunch?" (I get invited to luncheons at my University from the education department and its an hour away). I replied,"Yes, anytime the word "luncheon" and an invite comes my way I say YES". LOL!  What I mean is, I've been a stay at home mom for 13 years and have watched my husband get invited to lunches, trips, parties and more. What have I been invited to? A PTO meeting. Ha! 
Going to college at 36 years old is AMAZING.  I mean, I feel so alive when I am on campus.  I feel like I am getting a second chance to experience what I missed out on so many years ago. 
Anyone that is having second thoughts or wondering if they should go to school, DO IT!  It will change your life forever.

This is Me, Then.

Sunday, February 26, 2012

What is Important to You?

I don't know about all of you but the three people I share a home with are the most important things in the world to me.  Every move I make, every breath I take, is for them.  When you take the vow of marriage it is forever, so make sure you marry your best friend.  When you decide to become a parent, now that's truly forever.  Some parents say they are done when their kid turns 18. Not me, I am going to parent these two from beyond this world!  They are stuck with me forever.  I am going to be there for them through thick and thin. I am going to fight for them. I am going hurt for them. I am going to keep this family together no matter what.  My son tells me he hates his sister, I am going to say, "Ok, let's go over there and tell her you hate her.  Now be ready, she's gonna tell you she hates you too, no one is perfect and we are gonna kick and scream until you two make up. Or I'm going to call you every day until you make up". Then one day it going to happen again, and I will fix it again.  I fight for my children, I listen to them. I let them beat me to pieces and I get right back up because I am their mother.  They do no wrong in my eyes and I never love or choose one over the other.  If one is hurting I ask him what I can do to fix it and I do it.  Will it work, who knows, but they know I tried!   As parents we must also remember our words are like daggers.  Your kids can tell you how horrible you are a million times and you still love them. But if a parent is negative or hurtful towards their child it cuts like a knife.  You can never get that piece of their heart back.  They will keep it hidden forever. 

Then those grand babies!  I can't wait to be sitting on the sidelines at all those t-ball games or dance recitals with my grandma tshirt on begging my children and their spouses to let me have those babies for the night or the week!  I will make my home so inviting and have a room set up for them so they want to be there.  Not, so stuffy and unkid-friendly that no one wants to come over!  I will get my teaching degree so I can be with my kids and grand kids any time they need me and more.  I will fly, drive, walk or crawl to them.  They will have to beat me away with a stick!  And if my son or daughter in law don't like me I will find out why and fix it!  I will do anything for my children and I won't miss a thing! 

Being a mother is the most important thing in the world to me. 
What is important to you?

This is Me, Then.

Monday, February 6, 2012

College Moms and Working Moms

I found the following info and wanted to share.  I think it pertains to working moms as well.

How To Balance School and Family When Mom Goes Back To College
How to Balance School Life With Family Life

For the busy mom returning to college, the most important ingredient in mixing school life with family life is balance. In order for Mom to return to college to earn a degree or prepare for career advancement, there must be a balance between family life and dedicated school time. It is important to maintain a strong healthy relationship with loved ones while taking the time to study. Whether you choose to learn online or attend a college or university, setting up a schedule will be invaluable in maintaining your sanity and achieving your goals.

College Students Require Time Alone

It is important for the kids and the spouse to realize that the busy student needs alone time to study and complete lessons. A clear and detailed schedule with designated study time and playtime, will help in defining when Mom is available and when she needs to be left alone. Online learning may seem to be an easier way to fit education into raising a family, but it still requires time to accomplish lessons, complete assigned reading and study for tests.

Schedule Time for Study and Play

A schedule posted on the refrigerator with blocked out times when you are studying and will help kids adjust to Mom not being readily available. The balance to this is of course scheduled time for play and family time. For the schedule to be successful, it should be strictly followed. When it's playtime, then play. When it's date night with the hubby, then go out and have a fun without worrying about that paper that needs to be finished or that last chapter you put off reading.

Share What You Learn in School

If you have school-aged children, your school experience can be used as an example to them. Your good study habits will be emulated by your children. Also, you can share what you are learning with your children. Share relevant topics with them at the family dinner table and encourage discussion. By making them a part of your learning experience they will feel more involved and may feel less threatened by your interest in something other than them.

Prepare to be Flexible With Your College Studies

Though the goal is to maintain and follow a set schedule, life inevitably will get in the way at times. When that happens, then flexibility becomes a factor. You should always have a built in 'whoops' in your schedule. Obviously in times of real family emergency, family wins out over school. Lessons can be made-up, but when the kids need you, it can't be put off or ignored. Have backup or standby childcare available. Try and stay caught up on coursework and study ahead if possible. Don't put things off until the last second. Be prepared. Expect the best, but prepare for the worst.

Set Aside Time to Study Alone

Your designated study time should be strictly adhered to by all members of the family. Make it clear that when you are studying, you are to be left alone, baring any real emergencies. You may have to lay out in detail what constitutes an emergency - "Can I have a snack", as opposed to "The toilet is plugged up and overflowing." During mid-terms of finals, this time may need to be expanded. Just make sure the kids know that it is only for a short while, and afterwards the normal schedule will resume.

Family meal - balancing school with family

Game night - balancing school with family

Ice Cream Sundae Night - balancing school with family

Family study time - balancing school with family Set Aside Time for the Family

Family meal time

Meals are a great time to spend with the family. It can start with preparation. Let the kids help in the kitchen and use the time together to talk about the day and any upcoming events that might effect the schedule. Even though the convenience of fast food dinners may seem very appealing, family dinners at home, offer much needed family time.

Game night

Board games, seem a bit outdated these days, but they are a wonderful way to spend time with the family. Many of the popular board games and card games can be played with younger family members but still offer a challenge to the older children and the parents. It can be a fun time for the family to bond together.

Movie night

Let the kids take turns picking out a movie for the family to watch. This can be from your own collection or make a family excursion to your local movie rental store. Share a big bowl of popcorn or similar favorite family snack. If the movie happens to go on beyond the usual bedtime, so much the better.

Ice cream sundae night

Set one night a week aside for ice cream night. Let each child in the family pick out their favorite ice cream flavor and toppings. If the children are old enough, let them build their own sundae. For this one night, don't worry about the mess or the extra sugar intake. Make it a family event.

Go to the theater

If you are attending a college or university, take advantage of the student priced tickets for school performances. Check out the program of upcoming plays or concerts and plan ahead to take the kids to appropriate shows. Not only will this give them something to look forward too, but it may allow them to see live performances that you would not ordinarily be able to afford to take them to.

Study together

If your children are in school also, you can spend time together studying. This can be a better alternative to Mom shutting herself up in her room to study alone. Also you will serve as an example and help instill good study habits.

What Tips Do You Have for Busy Moms? 
My tip: Run errands one day a week.  It's better to be crazy all in one day running the roads than a little crazy every day.

This is Me, Then.